The most profound experience of the grace of Love in this life is when the infinite Solitude within you meets the infinite Solitude within another. We are diverse expressions of the same Solitude.
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She reached out her hands, while she sat in the chair on the porch, where I had just moved from. We had said our 'Goodbyes,' and I was walking toward my truck, slowly. This was my last day to visit her. I, as Chaplain, had provided spiritual presence and guidance to her over the months, following the demise of her brother. But more - for I came to see how grief counseling is mostly about companioning; this is like simply going along with another in the natural flow of healing, encouraging mainly by being present, not trying to fix anything or offer information, and certainly not offering religious cliches. Presence heals.
I walked back, both of us smiling, and I shook her hands. We talked of how difficult it was to say this 'Goodbye.' We spoke of how we had had light moments, and serious moments, and much shared laughter.
* * *
A day later, and I had seen her and those outstretched hands in prayerful reflection, and been receptive to what that means. Hands can mean more than hands - in Grace, everything always means something else, even if it means what it seems first to mean, too. For me, that scene speaks of what I have often called 'Connection.' Connection is when we meet anyone and prior union in Grace arises into a recognition, or actualization, of Oneness. And this Oneness is prior to and expresses through our human diversity. We are born reaching out, for Connection is the incarnation of the will and desire of Grace to meet Grace, or 'God'-within to meet 'God'-within. How we attempt to put this in words is always an attempt, so frame it as you wish.
Now, I have spoken of a growth, or emergence, beyond the longing, beyond the self that longs for Connection. Few persons grow into this in this lifetime, in contrast to those who never are drawn beyond the longing. So, we have many more persons longing for Love than who have relaxed into Love. This being-beyond-longing, however, does not mean a ceasing of will or choice to experience the actualization of Connection. This does mean that you are prepared to receive the Connection arising without the felt-neediness for Connection - this neediness, always a part of longing, hinders a more pure, pristine experience of Union. We long, so to be grown, by Grace, beyond longing. And, again, the experience of Connection is not Connection, but the coming into this humanness as a prior Union - so, there is Connection and the experience of Connection. Another way of saying this is Love desires to Love, literally to meet and share with Itself. But this is not in the affective sense, and certainly not in any romantic sense, of which I speak. This is a more rare, but always present, sense of Pure Love transcending emotion and, so, the Connection is experienced differently than when as a feeling.
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This may all sound impractical. This is partly for we have emerged to see ourselves as personalities interacting or not with other personalities. Nevertheless, Connection with others in a way prior to and beyond our usual ways of relating is the most practical way of sharing - however, this is not understand or appreciated, until we come to taste this grace of Connection free of self, though self may be fully present as part of the experience. Substantially, we, in Grace, become the Connection and, so, come to know more of who we already are prior to the experience of Grace reaching out to Grace.
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